What to write?

As an amateur composer I fight with myself every time I sit down to write. What should I write? When I use the term amateur composer I mean that my full-time gig is not writing music (very few people write classical music full-time). When I sit down and dedicate time to music I have to choose my notes carefully. Do I write something for the bassoon? Do I write something huge that will comment on the ills of the world? Do I write something light and fluffy? Do I write something pop? Do I write something for my son; kids music?

I have no idea.

I say I do not know what to write because at this point in history, I am using the same musical language that has been used for the last 600-years. I am using the same notes, the same scales, the same harmonies that were used during the Renaissance, the Baroque, the Classical and Romantic Eras, and the 20th century. Below is a very short list of some of my favorites from 1450 to 1947 (feel free to add add a hundreds more):

Missa prolationum, Johannes Ockeghem

Pope Marcelli by Monteverdi

B Minor Mass by Bach

Symphony No.6 by Beethoven

Te Deum by Bruckner

Death and Transfiguration by Strauss

The Poem of Ecstasy by Scriabin

A Survivor from Warsaw by Schoenberg

After 1947 Classical Music or Art Music, has become...interesting. Because of the popularity of movie music with the general public and its fond love of the romantic and post-romantic style, serious composers have focused on self-expression and for the most part have migrated to academia rather than the concert halls. For those all familiar with Classical Music, what could I write that expands on 4:33 by Cage?

I also have to budget my time carefully. I work 40-hours a week at a job that I enjoy and I am lucky to be in a position where I contribute to the success of my department. My music degrees play a role in my job but the actual music part of those degrees do not. When I am off the clock my time is first and foremost taken up by my family and then everything else. I teach classes online (although not very often), so that takes up a portion followed by my blog to help my writing and career. What is left is for music.

With little time to write and the weight of Classical Music history behind me, what do I write? I am not sure; I will let Saint Cecilia guide my pen and see what happens.